Billy Mays

Billy Mays

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Getting Stabbed in Helsinki


Excerpt from On the Job Training - Berlin to Vladivostok (Volume One of The Rare Earth Series)


     The delegation from RR Donnelley, six of us invited from Poland to Finland in 1994 by the Myllykoski paper company, were being treated to a grand Mexican-style dinner at the Zetor Restaurant in Helsinki. We had already been treated royally for a couple of days by our immensely hospitable hosts and executives of the company. Juha's fun-loving, boisterous, and almost child-like play had us in stitches all night. His hilarious imitation of what he called a "Stukka Pilot" came out more than a dozen times as the flaming tequilas and vodka poured alongside our bottomless Corona buckets delivered to the table.
    
    
     Jussi, a bit more reserved and making an effort to balance Juha's wrecklessness, steered the discussion from time to time back to business. Jacek, the Manufacturing Manager from RRD, equally entertaining in his ability to keep a crowd in stitches, contributed to the growing energy level with his innate joke telling abilities, his singing, and his almost competitive zeal to drive the atmosphere to a frenzy. This table of 12 young Polish and Finnish business people had pretty much taken over the crowded restaurant in central Helsinki and the festive atmosphere had pulled in other folks from other tables in the crowd.


     ...It was loud in the restaurant and the Donnelley fiesta was still in full swing. What this guy had said to me took a few seconds to sink in and crowds of people had begun to form behind us and around the table. Surveying the situation, and not knowing if what I had heard really reflected his intentions or the danger he said I was in, a sense of helplessness came over me....     At that moment, he grabbed my arm with his free hand, stood up, almost lifting me along with him, smiled to everyone else at the table, and said, "Your friend and I are going to see what's going on at the disco!" The way he was holding his other hand in the coat pocket, I guessed that he had some kind of weapon he was planning on using. I assumed a knife.

    
     He powerfully pulled me through the crowd toward the pulsating music of the disco one floor below. Some of the Donnelley folks were following us. Juha was doing his Stukka Pilot imitation and I wished I could get Juha closer to us. His near two meter height and imposing frame, I thought, might discourage this guy from acting out his plan. The Donnelley folks veered off and I was left with this guy in the crowd.


     I started seeing white, afraid I was going to die in a pool of blood here in a Helsinki disco.

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